Freakin' Cars

More car woes. Is this a pattern, or what? I left work Monday evening and headed south to softball practice. I'm in the right hand lane of a four lane road with plenty of room in front of me and plenty of room behind me. To my left, there were several cars stopping for someone to make a left hand turn. I'm not sure if someone stopped too soon or what but this young girl felt the need to swerve into my lane to avoid rear ending someone. I was just almost right next to her as she did this and I had to dive for the curb to avoid her. I hit that curb hard, swerved back into my lane and a bit in front of the person turning, straightened out the car and pulled into the nearest gas station. I jumped out of the car furious and looked back up the street. The girl who forced me off the road saw me look her direction and then pulled into the right lane and came down to where I had stopped. She got out and apologized right away. I was so ticked that I didn't even acknowledge her except to ask her if she had an insurance card. From what I gathered over the next half hour she was driving a car for her dad that he had just worked on back to him. Her dad pulled into the lot just minutes behind us. I used his cell to call in the claim and got all of their information. Fortunately, the car runs fine. It looks like it just needs passenger side wheels, tires, and hubcaps. It also feels like it needs an alignment. They better have it done tomorrow as I need it after work. I'm still ticked that this sort of thing keeps happening to me no matter what car I own. It's happened to every single vehicle that I've ever owned.

I got into a conversation through e-mail about my misfortune owning a car. I surprised myself with my thinking, but I'm not sure what it means. Here are some quotes. Mine are in red and my friend's comments are in blue.

"This unexpected type of stuff just grates on my nerves as I'm sure it does yours. Wouldn't it be nice if that stuff just didn't happen to us? You'd think that life could roll right along just fine without these minor inconveniences. It's not like we learn any great lesson that will change our lives from it. All it does is cost us the time and money. Those types of things do make me frustrated with whatever God has in store for me. All the time and money I would have saved at this point in my life sure would be nice to have. All these things do is try my patience a bit and make me realize that being very wealthy would take care of any of those costs. It's still a waste of time and money, but if the money was provided in abundance I think it wouldn't tick me off so much."

"As for these things we should be learning from all the inconveniences of life...I think you answered that one yourself" She highlighted my words "frustrated", "try my patience", and "it wouldn't tick me off so much". "Just in case you didn't get the point...God just MIGHT be saying...TRUST ME...take a breath...calm down...and TRUST ME!"

"And what does patience bring? We have no choice but to be patient. There isn't any other choise we have in the matter so patience isn't learned; it's demanded. Is it wrong to be frustrated that it seems like God picks on me occasionally when it comes to having a perfectly running vehicle for any length of time? Is God really trying to tell me that I shouldn't have a car or something? That would be ridiculous. Is He trying to tell me anything at all relaing to me constantly having these stupid inconveniences that ONLY waste my time and money? There isn't anything to learn. There is no great lesson. There is simply no reason behind this stuff whatsoever. That's the stupid part I wish God would just leave me alone about. These stupid little minor things are things that I don't need, want, or require in my life and I wish He'd just cut it out. Yes, that's how frustrated I get. I know He's involved in my life so why would He allow such stupid things to happen when I have other things, more important things, to do? We get along great when He stays out of my transportation issues. Just let the freakin' car run, keep people and animals away from me, and I will take care of the maintenance. Sheesh. It's like it's too much to ask or something. Shouldn't prayer be used for more important things than struggling with God to just let me have a car that works every day, all the time, without inconvenience? It's not like I'm asking for billions of dollars, even though I do ask for that, too. I'm a simple guy who just needs a car to run since this world requires it."

"Maybe the lesson is to be THANKFUL for the blessings you DO have rather than gripe about the inconveniences...who knows...maybe in the midst of all this, you just might meet the "Ms. Right" that you have been looking for...she might be the secretary at a garage that you have not used before or maybe even the mechanic...(now THAT would be a blessing!!)

Now...as for "the stupid part that I wish God would just leave me alone about" I think you might be a bit misguided...GOD is not bugging you...GOD is getting you through it...SATAN on the other hand is the master at being a pain in the butt...make sure you focus your frustration at the right entity! You can curse Satan - even aloud - and he has no choice but to back off - especially if you mean it...God wants you to stand WITH Him, not against Him!

You asked a question in your ranting but unfortunately you asked the wrong one...You asked, "why would He allow such stupid things to happen when I have other things, more important things, to do?" The problem is this...WHERE IS YOUR FOCUS?? I know I'm preaching, but let me tell you something from experience...what you deem as important may not be what GOD is considering important. Now, don't go ruffling your feathers, because I AM NOT saying that your girls are not important. They SHOULD be the most important thing in your life after God...but as for all the other "more important things" you might want to evaluate if they are really as important as you make them out to be. Maybe God wants you to carpool for a bit...could be that there is someone He wants you to talk to...maybe someone needs you to help THEM to see HIM...have you recently asked God what important things He wants you to do for HIM??? Get out of your self centered "ME" mode and go at this with a different point of view...I bet you find something much better than "woe is me...I have car problems again" to look at!

"Funny thing is that I'd have more to be thankful for if these things didn't waste my time and money. And I won't be remarrying...not even a girl in a garage.

Satan doesn't move cars ni front of me and neither does God. When these things happen, God does allow it. Satan plays mind games and he's a loser that can't control physical things like that. I know who makes the world spin. Shoot, God didn't need to enter into this gamve of the Human Race with Satan. He could have just spoke it and Satan would have been gone. God created the angels so He can take that away, too. It's not like He had to create this place to put Satan in his place.

As for what is important, yes, I get to determine that. It's called free will and God gave that to us. Yes, my focus was getting to sofball practice quickly and safely. That didn't happen and it wasn't due to my focus on anything. Transportation is ONLY important for my girls and my job. That's it. I don't need it for anything else and I don't even need it for most concerts I go to. I get to pick the imporant things and I've deemed that it is VERY important that my car run any time I use it. There isn't any carpool for me to join; it's the inconvenience of getting rides from roommates. I can talk to them any time without having to have car trouble to do it. The last mechanic I got in touch with ripped me off and cost me the last car I had so there wasn't anything to learn there.

I am allowed to be and don't mind being self centered. It's a good life. Seriously. Also, I have asked God what the deal is with all this and it keeps piling on at the most inconvenient times. He doesn't have any great plan for me. Just the usual be a good person, do your job, stay out of trouble, bla, bla, bla... I'm not going to be a preacher or some great singer. I'm not going overseas to do mission work. The best I can do is set an example at work, which I do try, help others, which is my job that I enjoy, and be a good dad. That's pretty much all I'm cracked up to do in this life and it's fine. Allowing me to have constant car problems isn't going to push me in any direction for ministry of any sort. I'm not bummed about not having a "greater calling". I honestly don't care and am very content in many ways.

I'm not angry about this stuff, but I can't see the sense in it and wish it would stop. I'm not doing anything wrong with the car and I'm not doing anything wrong with my money. I just could use a lot more of it. My focus is fine. My life is fine. Just leave my freakin' transportation alone already is what I'm sayin'!

Does that make sense? I'm not bitter about anything except that I wish I could have a set of wheels that runs all the time for more than just a few months. It's been this way my entire adult life since my first car. This Toyota is my baby when I bought it because I knew it would last forever for me and get great mileage. Twelve days after I buy it a deer runs out in the road. Now a car swerves in front of me. I have done anything to deserve these stupid, stupid things."

"That was a PASSIONATE if not extremely LOGICAL view of life...You have such apathy...you really are bigger and better than you give yourself credit for...and I still say there IS a reason for your troubles...

I must say, I have never met anyone who was quite so content in their discontentment as you seem to be. By that I mean you are very happy to "verbalize" your frustrations...however directed I may think they are."

"Actually, I'm past middle age and don't expect to make it much past 50. That's just how Sites men are. My dad's generation is the first to make it past 60. My body is breaking down in a similar fashion to dad's. Unless I have a good woman keeping me healthy by encouraging me to get to a doctor (that means scheduling the appointment and making sure I get there) then I will be as lazy as I already am. Is it weird that the only thing I feel like I'm alive to do is see my girls every other weekend?

No, it's not a pity party. It's just a statement of fact that this is how my life is and as long as I have my (TV) shows and the occasional concerts that get me from week to week to see my girls, I'm content. It's weird how I went from wanting to save the world as a baseball player to trying to save the world as a rock singer to not caring if the world is saved or not as long as my girls are ok. Low expectations? Maybe. If so, then why the stupid disappointments of the automobile? HAHA!! When someone can answer that to my satisfaction, then I'm good."

It's an interesting view I found myself typing out yesterday. I'm not sure how much is bulls*** and how much is BS (me). It's still something I'm sorting through. The mind is a terrible thing...